Anybody Still There?

I haven't been here in years. So, anyone still get email alerts when I post something?

Nom de Pron

I needed a recipe today for some tuna steaks I wanted to put on the grill and I happened to have a hunk of ginger root leftover from a recipe I made a couple days ago. So I went to Google and typed in ginger tuna. It struck me as being an awesome porn name.

The Wettest Wet Nurse- Starring: Hugh Jemember and Ginger Tuna

I'd watch that. For about 45 seconds. Then I'd nap.

Sweetcorn

The title is one word because that's how it's said here in the Midwest.

There's a ton of little stands in Indiana that sell locally grown corn during the summer. That would be sweetcorn to you folks from around here since maybe there's some other kind of corn that you might get it confused with when buying it on the street corner. But there's one that's my favorite. I've never bought corn there but that doesn't stop me from having a preference. Before today, the reason it was my favorite is because there are these 2 really cute girls who work at the stand most days when I drive by. Reason enough, right? But today as I passed they were throwing an ear of corn across the parking lot where their golden retriever would run over, pick it up in his mouth, and come bounding back to do it again. He looked and ran and acted just like our golden, Sam.

I swear, if seeing the joy in the eyes of a golden retriever who's in the middle of fetching something doesn't put a smile on your face, your heart is fucking broken.

And You Thought I Was Scarce Before?

OK, tomorrow is officially going to be the biggest day since, well, since congress changed the official length of the world day from 22 to 24 hours. I can't remember what year that was.

The curious reader may ask, "Why Phollower?"

The bi-curious reader may have different questions entirely. Like, "Why not, Phollower? You know you want to."

I'm hear to address the curious reader. The bi-curious reader should've gotten to me 11 years ago before I got married.

There are 5 events occurring or possibly occurring tomorrow. In no particular order:

1. My new Playstation 3 is scheduled to arrive. I don't think I need to go into much more detail about the awesomeness of that. It's technically my X-Mas present but, you know.

2. My preordered copy of Agricola (complete with the "preorder exclusive" Animeeples is supposed to get delivered. I ordered the English printing back in December when it was announced and I was really excited to get it. Then it took a few months longer than the original ETA and I got a bit frustrated but now that it's set to arrive I'm totally psyched again.

3. The copy of NHL '08 that I got off eBay (at a bit of a steal, I might add) may be in the mail. NHL '09 is coming out soon but I really want to be able to play hockey with my brother in law who lives in Buffalo. He has '08, it was about $40 cheaper than '09, end of story.

4. Our new copy of Dungeons and Dragons 4th Edition Player's Handbook should get here. That means Sylvia and I won't have to share one anymore and we'll be able to make notes and put in page tabs and be as geeky as we want to be with our own copies.

5. Our co-ed softball tournament starts Monday night. After 11 grueling regular season games where sweat was actually worked up on occasion we've come to what we toil for so hard all year. OK, fine. Every team makes the playoffs and we'll probably be gone by the end of the 2nd week of games (since everybody makes it that far) but I still like to kid myself into thinking we'll get the big trophy this year.

So that's my Monday. Go ahead, tell me that day ain't huge. I dare ya.

Just Passing By

All right. I make no guarantees I'll be here on a regular basis but I wanted to share this:

Start with a cage containing five monkeys. Inside the cage, hang a banana on a string and place a set of stairs under it. Before long, a monkey will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the other monkeys with cold water. After a while, another monkey makes an attempt with the same result - all the other monkeys are sprayed with cold water. Pretty soon, when another monkey tries to climb the stairs, the other monkeys will try to prevent it.

Now, put away the cold water. Remove one monkey from the cage and replace it with a new one. The new monkey sees the banana and wants to climb the stairs. To his surprise and horror, all of the other monkeys attack him. After another attempt and attack, he knows that if he tries to climb the stairs, he will be assaulted.

Next, remove another of the original five monkeys and replace it with a new one. The newcomer goes to the stairs and is attacked. The previous newcomer takes part in the punishment with enthusiasm! Likewise, replace a third original monkey with a new one, then a fourth, then the fifth.

Every time the newest monkey takes to the stairs, he is attacked. Most of the monkeys that are beating him have no idea why they were not permitted to climb the stairs or why they are participating in the beating of the newest monkey.

After replacing all the original monkeys, none of the remaining monkeys have ever been sprayed with cold water. Nevertheless, no monkey ever again approaches the stairs to try for the banana.

Why not?

Because as far as they know that's the way it's always been done around here.

That's good stuff right there.

Name Change

Alright, I'm fully aware I've been ignoring not just my blog but blogs everywhere lately. See I got this new guitar and I've pretty much been playing it during all my free moments. If you click on the "review" button you'll see the color I got too. It rocks. Not in my hands it doesn't (yet) but the guitar itself is really awesome.

As far as the title of this post is concerned, there's been a change made to the name of a popular donut and coffee establishment in order to better represent its true nature. From this day forward it shall be referred to as BadunkaDunkin Donuts.

I'll be back sometime.

If Everyone Else Jumped Off A Cliff...

Well, since tysgirl and limpy went on vacation I thought I would too. Sylvia and I are heading to Colorado with her dad, his wife, and Sylvia's brother. It'll be a week filled with hiking (Great Sand Dunes NM, Sangre de Cristo Mountains, Rocky Mountain National Park, Colorado State Forest State Park (yes, that's really what it's called)) whitewater rafting class IV and V rapids, camping in a yurt, and generally goofing off.

On a completely unrelated note, The Spousal Unit just asked me why the winner of the Indianapolis 500 drinks milk. Turns out Louis Meyer, who won the race in 1936, drank buttermilk after the race because it was his favorite. The Milk Foundation decided that was too good of a promotional thing to pass up and has made sure the winner has a bottle of milk ever since. Fine, it's a dumb tradition. Whatever. I mention this not because of it's riveting trivia value but because (according to the one online source I happened to see it at) PETA is hoping to stop the tradition. The organization is looking to end the drinking of the milk, claiming it to be a "beverage born out of cruelty to baby calves" and a "racist drink."

Ohhh Kaaay. I'm with you on preventing animal cruelty but, christ, it's fucking milk. And it's racist? Should it be alternated with chocolate milk?

Back to the regularly scheduled banality you've come to expect.

I'll be gone from Saturday til the following Saturday and, unlike other bloggers who set up posts to come up on scheduled days during their absence, I'm just not going to think about you at all. It's not that I don't care, it's just that I really don't care.

Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to go kick a calf in the nuts, just so he knows what cruelty is really like.